Do what is right, for yourself and for others.

People spend too much time finding other people to blame, too much energy finding excuses for not being what they are capable of being, and not enough energy putting themselves on the line, growing out of the past, and getting on with their lives.
-J. Michael Straczynski

As I was reading through the "Finding Your Power," article, it became clear to me that the way I rise above excuse making is to recognize the importance and value of getting involved with that specific situation.  That way, there is no valid reason to make a poor excuse to, for example, attend a certain event or meet up with a couple of friends that I haven't seen in a while. I keep an open mind to everything I do and am involved in. 

Also, I ask myself, "How will this experience benefit my beliefs and my life decisions in the future?". In order to help others break out of there shell of always blaming others and making excuses for various situations, it is important to push them out of their comfort zone in small steps. It is also important to create a sense of trust between you and the other person. This allows them to begin to see that you are doing these things only for the better, and not to make their lives miserable.  If I witness another person blaming someone else or constantly making excuses, I confront them by asking questions, such as "Why do you feel that this person is to be blamed for ___?" or "Is there a bigger/different reason why you don't want to go to ____?". Asking them questions that actually require them to think deeper into their primary decision might spark the thought and questioning of why they are in this avoiding and blaming mindset and making the decisions they have continuously chose. 

I feel that this will also force them to look at the situation from a broader perspective, realizing for themselves, the unhealthy and closed-minded approach they have towards new experiences and other people.

It isn't until you begin to fight in your own cause that you become really committed to winning and become a genuine ally of other people struggling for their freedom.

-Robert Morgan

During The People's Institute Retreat that I attended last weekend, the whole group had a very engaging discussion about being an ally to various identity and culture groups. We talked about the differences between being an ally for self-interest, an ally for altruism, and an ally for social justice. I feel like, as an ally, one needs to focus less on their personal interests, a specific targeted group, or a specific victim of oppression, and focus more on being an ally for the issue. It is important to work with the members of the targeted group to help empower every single person and to, together, get rid of the discrimination against these identities as a whole. I completely agree with karynthia, in "The Do's and Don'ts of Being an Ally", as she mentions that in being an ally, one has to realize that it's not about you and your feelings about the oppression. Being an ally is all about showing support, empathy, and extending grace for the social group and the difficulties they are facing. In the TPI retreat, we went around asking what people expect from their allies, and came up with various characteristics: loving, caring, confident, brave, strong, empathetic, respectful, genuine, decisive, honest, articulate, knowledgeable, consistent and a couple of others. An area of improvement for me to become a better ally to others is to show more support. And by that, I don't mean just simply being their friend and hearing them out, I mean attending various events, dialogues, and meetings to show that I am actively supporting and fighting for their rights for social justice. In being an ally, one of my strengths is definitely being empathetic towards the situation someone is experience. I try to put myself in the shoes of the other people and understand what they are going through. It is very important to me to be a strong, supporting, and empathetic ally for another person/group. I understand, and can imagine, what it is like to be treated unfairly within society and believe that no one deserves to be treated this way. Also, I believe that in moments of weakness and difference situations, everyone needs someone there to support them and help them back on their feet if they fall.

I attended both the Scholarship Junkies presentation for college students on Thursday and the Scholarship Junkies presentation for High School students during our S.T.A.R.S. Leads meeting on Friday. Both presentations were phenomenal and definitely gave me a greater insight of how valuable scholarships are and how important it is to take advantage of all application opportunities. There are various ways, that Sam presented to us, to enhance our scholarship applications and essays. One important factor, is to make your essays unique and personal. You have to show that you stand out from the other 100's of applications for that scholarship.

In need of change.

"The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers. "

-M. Scott  Peck. 

I wasn't able to make it to our STARS Lead meetings this Friday because I received the opportunity to attend the first annual The People's Institute Retreat at LUREC. A couple of other STARS Lead members also attended this retreat, making it a greater experience and allowing us to make a stronger connection between what we discovered this weekend and our STARS Lead project. Throughout this retreat, we learned a lot about being conscious of ourselves and our identities and how we can connect these discoveries to the leadership aspects of our lives. Being able to explore myself and my life experiences, I found a true connection in using my unique identities and struggling past experiences to strengthen my role as a leader in expanding and promoting social justice within my community. If you couldn't already tell, this retreat shared A LOT in common with what the STARS and the STARS Leads programs tend to focus on. 

I was happy after hearing that they watched "Waiting for Superman" during Friday's meeting. I have seen this documentary, and I definitely have a lot of feelings toward it. After watching it, it  makes me feel sad that this issue of not giving a child the simple opportunity to get a good education is actually happening in America. What ever happened to being the land of freedom, chance, and opportunity? It surprises me that with so many documentaries, articles, and news broadcasts presented to society, showing the truth behind these so called "smart" decisions of authoritative figures, things still aren't being changed, and more and more children are still losing their chances for a greater future. Seeing the willingness and intelligence in these child in the documentary, all they really need is the chance to be able to attend an institution with a great quality of education. From there, they'll take the lead, and will not disappoint you. 

Most of the time, I am the type of person that will look at the glass half full, instead of looking at it as half empty. I love being happy and making others feel great. Most of the time, I am also the type of person that has this voice in the back of my  mind that tells lies and negative remarks, forcing me to seeing the glass mostly empty when it is really half full. There has always been this shadowing lack of confidence in my heart that has never really faded away no matter how well I succeed at something. Reading the "12 Lies to Stop Telling Yourself" article, I have realized that I need to stop constantly telling myself this negative narrative of my life and actually looking at the facts of the things I have accomplished and committed to. This ties into the blog we had to write about happiness. If you constantly keep telling yourself that you are not happy, you'll just keep digging a bigger whole for yourself and will never be able to see the truth of what you have in front of your eyes. All you need to do is remind yourself to turn the lights back on and to see the reality and truth of your life, not the lies that are leading you towards the darker path. 

Happyness.

As easy as some people make it seem, being happy is very difficult. It's interesting because, referring to all of the points listed in the article, I knew all of that. I know that, in order to be happy and choose happiness, you must follow your heart, try your best in everything you do, surround yourself with wonderful people, take care of yourself, and so on. The thing is, it's not that simple. From a broader outlook, I have lived (and am living) a great life. I have been given unbelievable opportunities, especially while attending Loyola. I have wonderful and supporting friends, family members, teachers, mentors, and advisers. My grades are good and I have received a generous amount of aid financially with scholarships and federal funding. I have a boyfriend that loves me for who I am and what I believe in. There's no reason for me to NOT be happy, right? Wrong. For quite a while, I have been having this internal battle within myself, and I just couldn't figure out the solution for my problem, let alone the problem itself. I couldn't figure out why I wasn't truly happy. I've finally realized that, in being truly happy, all of those external factors in my life don't matter. Yeah, I knew that I have to follow my dreams and my heart in order to live a happy life, and that I have to try my best and take care of myself to choose happiness in my lifestyle. But did I reeally ever do those things? I thought I did. But I have come to realize that I really haven't been doing that. Well... I have been doing those things.. but for the people and things around me. Not for myself. That was my problem. I forgot to turn the lights on with how to genuinely be happy. I was focusing too much on helping and satisfying others, putting myself in the dark. Don't get me wrong, helping others is not bad, the 8th way to be happier is to help others. I need to remember the things that I know to start living a happy life with things that truly and genuinely make me happy. 

"Just love what you have, and you'll always have what you love."

My mom always said this to me as I was growing up, and it has stuck with me ever since.

Each of those 10 ways are amazing ways to choose happiness. One of my most favorite lines from that article is, "You can hold on to the past, or you can create your own happiness today. Never let success get to your head and never let failure get to your heart." Letting success get to your head only makes you set higher and higher standards for yourself, making it more difficult to reach them, letting you become more vulnerable to disappointment and anger. Also, let's say you didn't beat your time during your swim race, or you didn't get the grade you wanted on a test or quiz, allowing the thought of failure get to your heart makes it harder for you to believe in yourself for next time, making you more vulnerable to feeling insecure and disappointed with yourself. This is how I have started to appreciate my life more and why I am a much happier person today. If something during the day or week goes wrong, or not according to plans, I make sure to not get so let down about it. I remind myself that what ever happened happened for a reason. I also try to think of something positive that came out of the situation, so I know that not one second of my time has been wasted. I have also started to smile a lot more. I find it very important to, not only smile for yourself, but to smile to others. Walking in the city I make sure to keep my head up and smile to the strangers around me. You never know whose day, week, year, or even life is going to be made, or saved, just because of doing something so simple. 

Over spring break,

I spent a lot of my time at home with my family, at work, and with old friends. Even though I didn't even accomplish half of what I had on my to-do list, my time spent with friends, family, and co-workers was definitely worthwhile. It allowed me to remember what truly makes me  happy (and what doesn't make me so happy :P). Spending quality time with my mom and watching my younger sister's water polo games was probably one of my most cherished and favorite moments during my break. 

For the summer, 

one of the things that I have planned is to have a couple of jobs, working towards my goal of traveling around the world. I plan to have one of the most amazing summers ever, taking chances and spending time with the people that I love. 

"If you never did, you should. These things are fun, and fun is good." 

Dr. Seuss

With my E-portfolio, 

things have been going a little slow. :/ It's just that with so many other things to focus on, that has been one of a couple that were,  unfortunately pushed aside. Within the next two to three weeks, I barely have any tests and quizzes to study for, so I'm definitely planning on getting a move on with  my portfolio. :) 

Alright. Let me give you some background about this video. When I was in about 7th/8th grade, there was this website called funnyjunk.com (I don't think it exists anymore, and if it does, it's not as cool as it used to be). My sister and I came upon this video and, when we watched it, we couldn't stop watching it for like 10 minutes straight. We were cracking up till we were bawling our eyes out and peeing our pants (probably were, I don't remember lol). It was one of those moments where you don't know why something is so funny, but you just can't stop cracking up. I feel like those moments are one of the best moments in your lifetime. :) This is probably one of the stupidest videos I have ever seen, but, to this day, I still can't stop laughing my butt of while i watch it. Try to watch it for about a minute or two, I hope you find it as funny as I do... or at least get a smile on your face. :) 

"Don't Worry, Be Happy."

Angee:)

Just Breathe.

Okay, remember when I said that we were DEFINITELY going to have a student panel with the high school students  from Amundsen? Yeah, no. It unfortunately didn't happen... again. ://


 Our time wasn't wasted though. Instead, we had Loyola students from the Empowerment Pipeline come and speak with us about the high school students and about what the Empowerment Pipeline is actually about. Talking with them definitely gave me, and I'm sure others as well, a greater insight of how the Empowerment Pipeline came together and what it's mission really is.  When I first heard about the 'Empowerment Pipeline', I thought it was a group of high school students that started this group and they were the ones taking a stand towards this issue. It is actually a group of about 6-7 Loyola students that come together and reach out to CPS high schools, visiting their schools, answering their questions, and telling them anything they want to know to help them prepare for college. Like I have mentioned before, I can not wait to get started with these students and listen to their perspective on what college and getting a higher education means to them. After meeting with the students from the Empowerment Pipeline, I am strongly considering becoming a part of this organization.

For our next entries, we were told to read an article called, "Why we find it hard to Meditate". I was sort of puzzled as to why we are jumping from topics such as social justice and educational inequalities in the community to meditation and relaxation of the mind. As I was reading further into the article I started to understand why. As college students, we are bombarded with tasks to do and assignments to finish from every direction. Not only do we aim to get the best grades we can to pass classes and keep scholarships, but we also think about the bigger picture and want to become a part of something, want to make a change. I don't know, maybe I'm only speaking for myself, but that is always on my mind, and every single day I think to myself that I don't want to be just another face, I want to do something that'll make a difference, something that'll change lives. With these thoughts and those assignments flooding our minds, we don't really find time to just sit and chill. And I feel like that's the reason we were asked to read this article. With all of these social justice issues being introduced to us and the tasks of preparing blogs, speaking to high school students, creating a capstone project, as well as all of the homework and exams on the side, we really DO need that time to just stop and breathe. When I was in high school, in gym class, we once did this thing called Neuro-muscular Relaxtion. Seriously the best meditation I have ever done. You lay there, in the dark, flat on your back with your arms at your side. Our teacher was giving us directions on how to focus on relaxing one part of your body at a time through out that time. It really helps you focus on something that doesn't stress you out for once.  Haha, but anyways, I have meditated before, not in like a meditation session/class or anything, but I have done it on my own. A way I usually meditate is with music (Hence the musical notes above :P). Specifically with symphonic orchestra type music. It really does help. You become less stressed and it gives you the time to allow you to tell yourself that everything will be okay. I don't meditate as much as I used to or as much as I should. But it's definitely one thing that I am going to add on to my schedule.


I really enjoyed reading "What can the rhythm and flow of a pendulum teach us about balance and personal growth." I feel that this type of a mind set is one of the most essential things needed in order to live a happy and satisfied life without any regrets. Sometimes one can think that there is no possible way someone can be that happy with their life all the time, how can they not let things get to them? I always try to keep a positive outlook on my life. Yeah, there are times that I bring myself down and just want to give up, but that's when I realize my thoughts and stop myself for a moment to rethink things. I feel like the key to being able to think in this positive way is through practice. If you catch yourself being extremely upset about something that is going on in your life, stop yourself and remind yourself of the rhythm of life. To help myself maintain a balance in my life, I always try to make sure there is some down time for me to be able to slow down in the day and reflect. If you know me and my life style, you know that I barely have time to even sit down and breathe and that's where this meditation/balancing process becomes lost in my daily schedule. But even in moments such as the 10 minute El-ride it takes me to get to and from work I find the time to just think about my life and how I am doing. I feel like writing these blog entries also allow me to be at peace with myself for a good 45-60minutes a week.

“Now is the accepted time, not tomorrow, not some more convenient season. It is today that our best work can be done and not some future day or future year. It is today that we fit ourselves for the greater usefulness of tomorrow. Today is the seed time, now are the hours of work, and tomorrow comes the harvest and the playtime.”
~W.E.B. DuBois

This is an amazing quote to live by. Don't waste your time looking for the perfect moment to do something, that perfect moment does not exist. The time to act is now. I think it's really important to take on this type of attitude in your everyday activities, whether it be in your job, classes, towards you school work, friends, family, etc. There is no better time to take the chance and do something than right now, because who knows... maybe you wont get another chance.


This bloge entry was a little more lengthy than I wanted to it be... but here is a video of one of many versions of neuro-muscular relaxation. Try it out: Right before going to bed,  lay on the floor (flat on your back), make t his video full-screen, put your arms at your side, eyes closed, and just listen to this video. Don't think about anything else except for what this woman is saying. Hopefully you enjoy this meditation and continue of doing it through out your life :)

Inspired and Motivated.

Last Friday we were supposed to meet with high school students from Tilden High School for a student panel. Unfortunately the plans didn't go through, and the students were not able to visit us. But we still did use our time wisely. We prepared ourselves and discussed about more background information of educational inequalities within Chicago. We were told to watch three videos and reflect upon them our feelings and thoughts about these certain topics. 

The first video was called "Explaining the Inequalities in Education in Chicago". This video is based more on the statistics related to the school-to-prison pipeline and difficulties within the families that are struggling in this area. As much as it is sad and disappointing to listen to these statistics, I really enjoyed watching this video. It opens ones eyes to what is really going on within our education system. This video touches base with every side of this issue mentioning struggles of the teachers, students, parents, and the government. My favorite part of the video is the end when the woman says, "The question is not who is to blame, the question is, what are we going to do about this?" This is directed towards the audience, towards society as a whole, towards us. We must stand up and do something about this issue.

The second video was of a student enrolled in a CPS school, Malcolm X. London, reciting his poem about what his education in a CPS school means to him. This video, "Louder Than a  Bomb: High School Training Ground," really touched my heart. I found it very interesting how he refers to the Chicago Public Schools as a training ground where "oceans of adolescents come here to receive lessons but never learn to swim." He believes that Chicago Public schools are doing what they are made to do, only to train these adolescents. Whether or not these students have learned and are actually prepared and ready for what is to come in the future doesn't really matter to these schools, as long as the training is done.  He not only touches the surface of the issues and problems but goes deep into it and expresses what is really happening within. I respect Malcolm X. London for being able to speak out for what he really believes about his society and expanding his beliefs to the whole community. 

I have seen many videos that go along the same lines as the third video we were told to watch, "Inspiration: How Bad Do You Want It? (Success)." This video was unique and really stood out for me. He isn't directly telling the audience what to do and how to do it, but he is telling a story and connecting it with the audience. In the video, one word was repeated a lot.. Success. The raised a question in my mind, "What really is success?" To me, success is a lot of things. Success is doing something to the best of your ability and doing it with a purpose that you are proud of. "If you want to succeed as badly as you want to breathe, then you will be successful." This is my favorite line from the video. To me, that means that if you're going to do something and accomplish something, you need to do it with everything inside of you. 

Next week we are definitely having a student panel with the students from the other high school, Amundsen High School. I can not wait to actually get things started with these students and to be able to work with them on an issue that our STARS LEAD group is very passionate about. I am excited to share my story and my experiences with the students and to hear what they have to say about the issues surrounding them.

Take Action.

"The only sure way to

change the future is

 to do it yourself."

After Friday's meeting, many different thoughts were soaring through my mind. We discussed the topic of educational inequalities across the country and watched a video called Black Males, Black Dreams which focused on the struggles of specifically black males in high schools all throughout America. Prior to watching this video, I was aware of some educational inequalities, but I did not know it was this severe. This situation really needs to change. I feel that school-to-prison pipeline is an extremely unfair system. Not only are the students already living and learning in a poor and unprotected environment, but, here you see schools enforcing policies in which they pretty much push these students more into jails and prisons and less towards motivation and success in academics, and overall, their lives. After reading the article, "Locating the School-To-Prison Pipeline," I was in shock. How could schools be treating these children like that? Not giving them a second chance or even a chance at all? This system is not displaying any servant leadership, let alone ANY leadership, at all. They are not listening, and are not trying to listen, to these students that are struggling. Their sense of empathy seems to be completely absent. Just because a kid is failing in his classes and severely misbehaving in school doesn't mean they have to be escorted out of their school by policemen to go straight to prison. In the "Locating the School-to-Prison Pipeline, I read that, "Even worse, schools may actually encourage dropouts in response to pressures from test-based accountability regimes such as the No Child Left Behind Act, which create incentives to push out low-performing students to boost overall test scores." There is a reason for this rise in failure and fall in motivation in these students. They just need someone to listen, be there, and not give up on them; the school-to-prison pipeline is doing everything besides that. 

I am currently a tutor in an after-school program at Gale Math and Science Academy in Howard, and I am witnessing a lot of similar negative attitudes and unwillingness to try in school, leading to many detentions and suspensions. So, not only as a STARS Leader, but as a tutor and a friend, I plan to raise awareness in the school and community about the educational inequalities taking place in the city of Chicago. I hope to practice servant leadership in a sense that I will trigger the motivation and care in the students at this after-school program. There is no reason for children to believe that they can't succeed in school, they just need to have the right resources and support to help them out and give them that boost. I will also get a chance to be a servant leader while working with the Empowerment Pipeline as one of our projects in the STARS Lead program. I am extremely anxious and excited to meet and talk to the students from Tilden High School next week and with Amundsen High School the following week. We will get a chance to talk to them about these issues, but more importantly we will get the chance to listen to what they have to say about how they feel about these unfair situations. Together, with these students, we will be able to create a great change and  lead suffering students down the right pipeline towards higher education.

So let's get motivated, and instead of waitin' on the world to change...let's do it ourselves.

What is Servant Leadership to you?

“In these days of difficulty, we Americans everywhere must and shall choose the path of social justice…, the path of faith, the path of hope, and the path of love toward our fellow man.” 
― Franklin D. Roosevelt

In last Friday's LEAD meeting, we attended a Servant Leadership workshop led by Patrick Green.

 It was a great workshop, and I definitely learned a lot about the meaning and qualities of servant leadership.

 Not only that, but we also talked about social justice and how it relates to our roles as leaders.

 The dictionary definition of Social Justice:

 "The distribution of advantages and disadvantages within a society".

My definition of this phrase is a little different from that.

 Solely, the word 'justice' means "the quality of being just, righteousness, equitableness, or moral rightness". So with that in mind... to me, social justice is serving and/or being a part of the community with the mindset of having equality and moral rightness towards those around you. I feel that FDR's quote at the top of this entry is a thorough example of what I aim for my leadership path to be. Everyday is a day of difficulty for at least one person around me, and with that, I have to have faith, hope, righteousness, and love in my daily schedule to help those around me.  

In regards to Servant Leadership and the workshop we attended on Friday, we learned that there are 10 characteristics identified with being a servant-leader; Listening, empathy, healing, awareness, persuasion, conceptualization, foresight, stewardship, commitment to the growth of people, and building community. As a whole group, we decided that commitment to the growth of people, empathy, and stewardship were the top three characteristics one must possess in order to be able to carry out the everyday tasks of a servant leader. As a leader, I believe that I have already acquired the characteristics of listening, empathy, healing, stewardship, and the commitment to the growth of people. Throughout my journey of becoming a better servant leader, I hope to obtain the qualities of persuasion, foresight and  

building community. I consider listening and empathy to be one of my strongest points of being a leader. It is important to others to be able to know and trust that you are always there to listen to them when they need someone to talk to. Through listening and being empathetic, a leader gets a better understanding of others and how they are able to help them out. 

I'm not exactly sure what my dream job is, 

but I know that what ever job I end up having, I want to change lives.

 I want to be able to heal the spirit of those that are hurt and give them hope for their future.

 I want to help others become the leaders they can be.

 I guess you can say my dream job is to be a servant leader... 

but on a much greater level than in just my community.  ") 

I'll leave you all with a quote about leadership that I really value as well as an awesome, chill song that I heard in the soundtrack of a movie that I have recently seen (Drive). 

I feel that being a real leader is being a real human being and a real hero. 

 Well, enjoy the rest of your day!

Angee :)

"We must be silent before we can listen. We must listen before we can learn. 

We must learn before we can prepare. We must prepare before we can serve. 

We must serve before we can lead." 

-William Arthur Ward